Desperate

I hate socialization. To me, socialize with others really hard. Harder than maths. Harder than everything. I wonder why I can't do it well. Facing so many people everyday tires me. Really tired. Sometimes I would think that may be I am predestined to be alone in my life. May be I am not suitable to be a friend, a good friend, a good girlfriend or good family member. I should be deserted by everyone.

I don't know how others judge me. I don't really know they like me or hate me. It seems I can get along with them very well. It seems like everything is fine. It seems like I am the one being so sensitive. I hate myself care about it so much. I hate myself for being so sensitive. I shouldn't think about it. Everything will be fine. I should not worry about it.

I guess I am too desperate today....zzz